Not Talking Only Makes Things Worse

Looks like George W. Bush is hell bent on not talking to Iran. Not talking has a history of making things worse. A lot of Americans don't like to talk about some things, like birth control, race relations, or the policies of the government of Israel. In my experience, not talking is not good. It is not good for one's personal relationships, the welfare of one's society, or the security of one's country.

For example, parents who don't talk to their kids about birth control do them a great disservice (as does a president who appoints an opponent of birth control to the federal post responsible for birth control). Those parents sometimes end up having much harder conversations forced upon them.

Sometimes, not talking may seem easier than facing up to a tough subject. Some people would rather not talk about racial inequality. Some white folks don't feel comfortable talking to black folks, even when they really do want to talk to them, and vice-versa.

Over time, a lack of communication creates a communication gap, literally. I have to concentrate sometimes to understand what some of my black friends are saying, but I am happy to make the effort. The more we talk, the better we understand each other. The better we understand each other, the smaller the gap between us. The smaller that gap, the greater the hope we will reach the point where we can live in harmony and not hegemony.

The folks who pushed for the invasion of Iraq talk hot and heavy about exporting democracy as though democracy were the bedrock of our society. It is not. Democracy is a structure built on the bedrock of any society: trust. And you can't have trust without conversation.

You can't solve conflicts without conversation. For example, the British government never defeated the IRA. It talked to the IRA as both sides de-militarized the conflict. America should talk to Iran. And terrorists. And anyone who wants to engage in dialogue.

Refusing to talk now only makes it harder to communicate when we talk later. And sooner or later we will talk.


  1. Scobb, nice posting. I agree with you, trust is the foundation of a successful civilisation. Trouble is, the underlying assumptions about humankind are very negative these days. 'Trusting' becomes a fools game. Guarding one's self becomes the rationality. I'm waiting for the paradigm change. PS: I came across your blog because I was bored and stumbled on it through a google link. Impressive all 'round, especially that a successful man is still socially conscious. Personal advice- think about vegetarianism though, it will take a great strain off our world's people, ecenomically, spiritually and physically.

  2. You sound like an smart man. I have these same thoughts that you do almost with verbatum. I am one of those people who stays silent until something inside of me boils over and I just explode. Your great to have expressed these thoughts. Thanks for saying it out loud.